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Domestic and Family Violence can be defined as a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner. Domestic violence includes any behaviors that intimidate, manipulate, humiliate, isolate, frighten, terrorize, coerce, threaten, blame, hurt, injure, or wound someone in the family or in intimate partnership. Domestic violence can be physical, sexual, emotional, economic, psychological, and/or actions or threats of actions that influence another person.
Domestic violence can happen to anyone regardless of race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender. Domestic violence affects people of all socioeconomic backgrounds and education levels. Domestic violence occurs in both opposite-sex and same-sex relationships and can happen to intimate partners who are married, living together, or dating.
Partner violence is largely a crime against women, often a serious crime, and its incidence varies significantly by age and ethnicity with young American Indian and Alaskan Native women at greatest risk.
In 2004, there were approximately 627,400 nonfatal intimate partner victims in the US.
From this there were 475,900 against females and 151,500 against males.
In 2004, there were more than 625,000 intimate partner victimizations and, on average, more than three women a day were murdered by their husbands or boyfriends.
Females age 20 – 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence.
Women living in households with lower annual incomes experience the highest rates of partner violence.
Family Violence Prevention Fund, Jan. 2007
Here, it is necessary to point to some characteristic of abusers. They are abused as children, grew up with violence, feel powerless and insecure, and their belief system about women.
In 1995, the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence (NRCDV) convened several national domestic violence organizations: the Family Violence Prevention Fund, the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, the National Domestic Violence Hotline and later the National Network to End Domestic Violence to launch a new effort to support domestic violence programs' awareness and education efforts for Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), observed annually in October. The collaborative effort became the Domestic Violence Awareness Project (DVAP).
The purpose of the DVAP is to support and promote the national, tribal, state and local advocacy networks in their ongoing public education efforts through public awareness campaigns, strategies, materials, resources, capacity-building and technical assistance. These strategies include campaigns that address the victimization of women throughout their lifespan. The voices, leadership, and expertise of women who have been battered are acknowledged as critical and necessary components of these campaigns. For more information their webpage is dvam.vawnet.gov
Effects on Children
Children are residents of the households experiencing intimate partner violence in 43 percent of incidents involving female victims. Domestic violence not only affects those who are abused, but also has a substantial effect on family members, friends, co-workers, other witnesses, and the community at large. Children, who grow up witnessing domestic violence, are among those seriously affected by this crime.
Frequent exposure to violence in the home not only predisposes children to numerous social and physical problems, but also teaches them that violence is a normal way of life – therefore, increasing their risk of becoming society’s next generation of victims and abusers.
The effects of frequent exposure:
Social and physical problems
The risk of becoming society’s next generation of victims and abusers.
More aggressive or withdrawn
Impaired cognitive abilities
Poor motor skills
Fearfulness, anxiety
Sleeping distress
Confusion of feelings
Distrust of close relationships
Safety Plan
If you are at risk of family violence you need to have a safety plan.
First and most important is to make sure you and your children are safe. Have a survival kit ready with money, medications, and important papers. Have a safe place to go. Emergency shelters are safe for you and your children. Call police or 911 if you are in immediate danger.
Keep domestic violence shelter phone numbers in safe place or memorize them.
Domestic violence Shelter Hotlines in Orange County:
Human Options hotline (949) 854-3554
Human Options toll free hotline 877-854-3594
Interval House (714) 891-8121
Laura’s House (949) 498-1511
Human option has Farsi speaking counselor and social worker.
General information in Orange County (714) 704-8207
U.S. National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or TTY at 1-800-787-3224
U.S. National Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-4673 automatically connects you to a local U.S. rape crisis program based on the area code of your phone number.
U.S. National Teen Dating Violence Helpline at 1-866-331-9474
Observing Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM), my office is offering free information, advice, and a short talk on safety plan to our community on these days and times: Saturdays October 24th and October 30th from 10 A.M. to 1:00 PM. Bring family members and friends. 1151 Dove S treet, Suite 200 Newport Beach, 92660 (949) 709-1374
Dr. Khazrai is a licensed marriage & family therapist with more than 25 years of experience in individual, couple and family psychotherapy, practicing in Newport Beach.
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